Archive for June, 2008

Russian Bath House Butt Massage

Sunday, June 15th, 2008

by Liz von Achen

I mentioned the Russian Bath House in a previous post. My friend Charmaine had first introduced me to this Manhattan experience on one of my visits to NY last year. I was grateful for Charmaine’s hospitality, and I insisted on treating us both to a “special treatment.”

The Russian Bath House web site copy mentions something about having a Russian strong man “pound” you on the massage table. I thought, hmmmmmm… do I want to get “pounded” by some big, sweaty, hairy guy named Boris? The web site also states that it’s standard practice for them to work on the inner thigh, tochis, and chest area. They said if you feel shy about that, to let them know. Well, because of a great gig I once had with a resort on Bonaire, I have gotten many a massage treatment, and I am not shy about THAT, so I was really looking forward to some ass-cell rejuvenation.

I chose the Sea Salt Scrub, and Cha-cha chose the mud treatment. Lucky for us, we got a nice young, therapist with a sexy mediterranean accent, and long rock star hair. His name was Jordan (pronounced Shor-dannnnnn). Shor-dan worked us both in side-by-side treatment rooms, going back and forth in between phases. I could hear Charmaine ooooing, and ahhhhing, and practically having an orgasm, and I was a bit envious because Shor-dan just wasn’t making the magic happen for me.

At the end of our treatments, Charmaine had red hearts flying out of her head. “I LOVE him…. ” she cooed. “Wasn’t that great when he touched your butt?” she asked. I was shocked. “He massaged your butt?! He didn’t do mine! And, he touched your boobies, too? What the hell?”

Charmaine said, “Well, you know Liz, I really can’t blame him for assuming you might get upset if he touched your butt. Honestly, you just look more like someone who would be shy. You just don’t throw off good ‘massage-my-butt’ vibes.”
In other words, I look more like a woman who somehow got separated from her midwestern tour bus, and would get all uptight about a butt massage?

Anyway, at the end, after he realized that I was the one who was paying, and tipping, I guarantee you, next time, Shor-dan will be paying extra special attention to my “tochis.” Plus, just to be safe, I am going to get a tattoo near the tip of my spine. A big arrow pointing down to my ass, with the words: “Rub here for good luck.”

© 2009 Liz von achen All rights reserved.